New Orleans CAO Job Ad
Are you an experienced magician? Can you use sleight of hand to force people to look one way while you do something creative elsewhere? When there's no bird in sight can you make a bird appear in the palm of your empty hand? Can you put on a top hat and tip it in a way that makes people want to toss in money?
If so, do we have a job for you!
Congratulations Mayor-elect Helena Moreno! You've won the best, highest-ranking public service job in the City of New Orleans. You've worked hard to get here. You were a television news reporter and anchor. You were a state legislator. You are a hard-working City Council member. You've faced all kinds of challenges, even finding ways to turn "nos" into "yesses" and working with people to find creative solutions.
Well, we've got a doozie for you.
Here are the keys to our wonderful city of worldwide renown. Unfortunately, we have a little problem.
Instead of handing over a city flush with plenty of money with which you can build the city of your dreams, we've gone from a likely deficit of $65 million to an incredible $160 million. I know. We can't believe it either.
The Louisiana legislative auditor provided City Council with the bad news, and it got worse. You have about $8 million to do everything you talked about doing, including significantly improving basic city services, fixing safety and permit problems, getting bills paid much more quickly and paying city employees a living wage.
We don't know how you're going to do this, but obviously you need a chief administrative officer with magical skills.
Apparently, comparing what was done to prepare for Super Bowl LIX earlier this year, you want will deliver "Super Bowl-level services to every neighborhood every day."
THAT is a big ask.
Seems you're in a high-profile higher-education institution situation. This CAO-coach must be a proven, successful leader with a track record of far more wins than losses -- and a salary much bigger than yours to make it happen.
Oh, and you might want to tell the candidates that the Super Bowl requirement must be done with an NFL-like bottom-feeder, perennial-loser budget.
Good luck. We're counting on you.